Long-Form Film Criticism and Fiction Writing by Derek Jacobs
The very best B-movies are the ones that do not take themselves too seriously and can create a playfully scary tone, hopefully while people run away from puppets or people in rubber suits. Gore is a plus, too. If these are the criteria, then Zombeavers is a champion. The scene before the opening credits (which … Read more
There are moments in Brad Bird’s Tomorrowland that overflow with joy and awe as the film whisks us away to another world of boundless imagination, possibility, and promise. In fact, the more we are forced to decipher from the fleeting glimpses of Tomorrowland and the more we are encouraged to wonder at what it truly … Read more
Who wants to have exactly zero fun watching Michael Fassbender starve himself to death? If there are any takers, I’d love to point you to Steve McQueen’s Hunger, a dramatization of the 1981 Irish hunger strike. McQueen burst onto the scene with this sobering tale of a five-year-long protest by incarcerated members of the Provisional … Read more
Those who were excited to see Cary Fukunaga’s rendition of the Stephen King classic It are going to have to find something better to do with their lives now, as the director and New Line Cinema have parted ways over budget concerns and disagreements about how best to structure the marathon story. Fukunaga, best known … Read more
When was the last time you were legitimately excited about a Johnny Depp movie? Be honest. Maybe you thought he and Tim Burton would pay appropriate homage to Alice in Wonderland (and were wrong). Or, before that, perhaps you thought a more faithful take on Roald Dahl’s Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was warranted (also … Read more
The best action movies succeed by crafting sequences with jaw-dropping visuals and physical stunts, hopefully with characters that we care about and in a way that advances the story. More and more often, action movies in this century lean hard on the crutch of CGI to dazzle us, and usually they are happy to dispense … Read more
There was never a reason to expect the sequel to Pitch Perfect to be very innovative. If you thought that the first movie was a tired exploitation of the popularity of Glee with a half-hearted attempt at comedy, then that’s what you’ll get with this rendition. Similarly, if you were amused by the a cappella … Read more
I try my best to limit the number of listicles that I post, which simply amount to some number of things ordered for people to bicker over the order or exclusion of particular things. But, this isn’t so much something like “Harrison Ford’s Top 10 Movies (You’ll Never Guess what #3 is!)”, but instead a … Read more
It looks like we’re actually getting a sequel to World War Z, which had exactly zero to do with the anthology of stories by Max Brooks (a similar phenomenon can be experienced by watching I, Robot after paging through Asimov’s collection of stories of the same name). This isn’t entirely unexpected, as the original grossed … Read more
Sometimes you just want to watch disease-ridden schoolchildren getting murdered by adults. For those times, there is the Cooties Trailer, released yesterday. I had heard absolutely zero about this movie before the trailer dropped online, so I was intrigued by the idea of small children contracting a zombie disease from questionable school cafeteria chicken nuggets. … Read more